I’m not going to lie. It was HARD to go back into work after celebrating Thanksgiving quickly followed by Chanukah, which came early this year! After a weekend full of cooking and eating and cleaning up and laughter, I had a hard time getting out the door for my Monday commute.
Echoes of joy and love carried me forward as I left the warm house that I have created with Betsy, the Love of my Life.
Driving in, I felt the pull to resign myself to the pull of the workweek. But I resisted letting the vortex take over and fall back into old patterns. I vowed not to leave my feelings from the weekend behind, committing to carry the love and inspiration forward, remembering who I am doing this for and why I am pursuing my mission.
Leaving for work this morning also made me empathize with the shift that many of my friends will make in the new year, returning to the office from virtual work. I especially thought about the dads.
If you are a father who is required to return to work in person in 2022, you are familiar with the pull that I felt on that Monday morning. Returning to a physical office can throw off your schedule, add time for commutes and meetings, and pull you away from cherished family activities and time to hang out with your kids.
You may be worried about slipping back into the way things were. It would be easy to sidestep the expanded role that you have created in the last two years. But you don’t have to fall back into old patterns. You have a choice to MOVE FORWARD into a new way of BEING, a new way of BALANCING.
What is balance, really? Is there such a thing?
If you are like me, when you think about the impact that your career has on your family and relationships, you don’t think about BALANCE.
Even when things are flowing, I never say, “I am feeling balanced.” I think about the ways that I feel OUT OF BALANCE.
I think about how much energy I spend at work versus how much I allow myself to play. I will say things like, “I need to get some balance back.”
It’s easy to forget that “balance” is a verb, too.
Every decision is a choice. Every decision reflects a priority in your career, family, and in your effort to take care of yourself.
You aren’t TRYING to balance.
You ARE balancing.
When a gymnast mounts the balance beam, they may look very still but nearly every muscle in their body is working to keep them standing on that narrow piece of equipment.
Do you feel like you are balancing like that gymnast, using every muscle in your being?
If you are ready to treat “balance” as a verb, a world of choices opens up for you. You don’t have to move back to 2019.
What do you want to create?
What kind of parent do you choose to be?
What kind of partner do you choose to be?
Let’s use everything that you have learned in the last two years to create a new plan.
Do you want to be a parent and a partner who:
— is present for the people you love?
— takes VIP care of your body and mind and spirit?
— remains connected with your support team?
Are you ready to re-norm fatherhood in 2022?
I am launching a beta test for a group of Emotionally Intelligent Fathers in January. If you are interested, sign up here.